Statistics continue to show an increase in the divorce rate in our country, with a significant amount of marriages ending around 5-7 years due to high conflict, or around 10-12 years due to feelings of disconnection. 80% of people in divorce mediation reported deterioration in the intimacy as being the number one cause for divorce, as opposed to only 20% citing an affair. We might think that issues in communication would cause marital distress, and that relationships in conflict have poor communication. In actuality, couples in distress often communicate what they feel and think quite well; the issue ends up being around what happens during and after the communication. Often times, couples can spend months, even years, trying to change their interactions based on common myths, and leave out parts of the relationship that research has proven are critical to a relationship’s long term well-being.
Being in a relationship can be difficult at times, and when we take into consideration the pace of life we’re experiencing, it is easy to put the quality of our relationship on the back burner. The Gottman Method Couples therapy is a scientifically based form of therapy that is delivered in a structured manner so that you and your partner can directly attain the changes you’re looking for. After years of research, this effective form of therapy has been proven to provide positive results that facilitate the development of permanent positive changes in relationships. The focus of therapy is to decrease conflict, increase intimacy, respect and affection, and create movement in areas you’re feeling ‘stuck’. A thorough assessment is done to best understand the health of your relationship: we assess strengths, as well as areas of struggle and need for growth. You are given a better understanding of how your relationship is functioning, and you can decide how to proceed with it, couples therapy being one of the possibilities. Once goals are set, by using in session video recording and specific interventions, you are able to understand the dynamics in your interactions, and learn new ways to approach issues so that you can both feel heard, comforted, and more solutions are created. You can learn science-based information about how your brain, body, and conflict style is preventing you from having more loving, intimate, and enjoyable relationships. Oftentimes, progress is made quickly, giving you the peace of mind and a great sense of relief, and allowing you and your partner to do more enjoying of each other rather than suffering together.
If you’re looking to improve, change, or prevent issues in your relationship, you can schedule a free 15 minute consultation or an 80 minute intake session with Anca Niculae, LMFT, and you can start improving your relationship by utilizing the Gottman method.